Monday, 29 August 2016

Not waving

Not quite drowning, either, but nearer the latter than the former. I finished my 'out of circulation' week this morning with the last of my latest batch of night shifts, and I'm now into a couple of days off, but it's done little to raise my spirits. Not only are these my last days off before the end of the school holidays, with the obvious implications for daytime eye candy, they're also the last before K disappears to uni - she'll be gone by this time next week. And she's busy on both of them, as well as most of the rest of the week, although my being on lates from Wednesday renders that pretty much academic. Not, of course, that I would ever dream of trying to stand in her way, even if it was possible, but going back to the sort of isolation I experienced between the end of my marriage and K's arrival in London just over two years ago is hardly the most enticing of prospects.
If there is any sort of light on the horizon, though, it may be by way of Nephelokokkygia. I never make promises about my fiction writing, because there have been far too many false dawns, but I do have two ongoing projects there that have a chance, at least, of coming to fruition. The muse could desert me at any moment, though, so I'll say no more until I can say something substantive.

Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B

Sunday, 21 August 2016

Ideal, in every respect but one

Back to work this afternoon, and the 'stay out of Zone 1 and pay half the fare' route to 'worktown' I now often use threw up one of those bittersweet moments I have no doubt any boylover would recognise. I spent 22 minutes, give or take, on the tube sitting opposite an achingly cute boy, 13-ish, a sort of a mashup of DBJ and (former) 'next door but one cutie', with a beautiful smile reminiscent of my niece at that age (no, I didn't harbour desires for her, but she did have a beautiful smile). And he gave the impression of having quite a bit more about him - the banter he was sharing with his two friends made it obvious that he was bright, and imaginative, and just fun. Ideal. Except, of course, that he could, would never be my friend, still less anything more. And, equally certainly, he'll be another 'ghost', never to be seen again. Once more, I feel like the pauper boy, nose pressed against the window of the toyshop whose delights he'll never be able to reach out and touch.

Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B

Saturday, 20 August 2016

The end of summer

Well, probably not quite, but today is certainly the last day of my 'summer fortnight' off, and, with it, the good weather I've been lucky enough to enjoy during my break seems to have come to an end as well - it was damp and drizzly yesterday, but it's been more organisedly wet and windy today. K and I did have plans for a rather unusual and potentially interesting trip today, but it involved heading to a 'ghost village' on Salisbury Plain, not a particularly appetising place to visit if, as the weather forecast suggested, horizontal rain was going to be the order of the day. In the event, we did have a few hours of quality time, including lunch at a branch of her favourite burrito chain, so all was far from lost. So, back to work tomorrow it is, although I don't, at least, have to get up at 'stupid o'clock', being on a late shift, so it could be (marginally) worse. It wouldn't take much encouragement for me to carry on with the past two weeks' lazy lifestyle, though.

Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B

Thursday, 18 August 2016

Uni, and a bucolic frolic

K got her A-level results this morning, and while they were a little short of her hopes and expectations, they were good enough for her to get her first choice university place. She's pleased, of course, and rightly so, and I'm just as pleased for her. Going where she's going has also resolved another loose end - given that she'll be in halls of residence for her first year, I will, subject to confirmation by the landlord, be keeping the flat on for another year, so that K has still got a home to come back to in the holidays and at the end of the academic year.
The rest of the day, K being off celebrating with her friends, has centred around a trip to the country. I met my brother and sister-in-law at a main station midway between London and their place, before driving out to a pub, pretty much in the middle of nowhere, which used to be a family favourite, but which none of us had visited for many years. As luck would have it, it was still as good as I remembered, and we had a long, relaxed lunch in the sunshine. All very pleasant indeed.

Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B

Wednesday, 17 August 2016

How time flies

When you're not at work, even if the 'fun factor' is rather thin on the ground. Just three full days left of my first two week summer holiday for longer than I care to remember. Still, I have got things planned, at least provisionally, for each of those days, before the treadmill reasserts itself on Sunday afternoon. Some say that retirement is a recipe for boredom, but, if it wasn't for the need to finance the remainder of K's education, I know I could find more than enough ways to amuse myself without having to be a wage slave. I hope to prove myself correct in, give or take, three years time.

Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B

Monday, 15 August 2016

Big Brother could be watching

Apropos of nothing in particular, I had a decidedly paranoid moment on my travels this afternoon. I was waiting on a station platform when it occurred to me that, because I have a 'registered' Oystercard, the proverbial 'they' could have been tracking my every move around London. That, alongside the forest of CCTV cameras festooned seemingly everywhere, would make it rather difficult for me to travel 'discreetly', should I want or need to. I suppose that my awareness of the issue at least gives me the opportunity to take 'countermeasures' - I'm sure untold numbers travel around the capital day in, day out without the 'surveillance culture' ever crossing their minds - but, short of decamping to some far-flung hilltop or island, and eschewing any kind of electronic transaction, covering your tracks is nigh on impossible nowadays.

Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B

Sunday, 14 August 2016

Don't smile like that

Unless you mean it. I was in my regular Wetherspoons last night, and Daniel was working. There wasn't much interaction at first, because the place was busy, but as the evening drew on and things quietened down, he became decidedly friendly. And smiley. Even as I left, although he was in the middle of serving someone, he raised his hand in my direction, smiling once more, saying 'see you later'. Does it mean anything? I can't bring myself to believe that it might - I can't envisage a more than passably attractive young man of 19, or thereabouts, ever having any interest in a fat bloke nearly three times his age, and one with a pathological fear of looking stupid, at that. But the glimmer of hope born of those smiles simply won't go away.

Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B