A minority of one

Another session of 'paedo-bating' at work this morning, a slightly different cast of colleagues today, but the 'vigilante' videos once more the centre of attention. Unlike my anger, at their bigotry and stupidity, and frustration, at not being able to kick back without bringing what little remains of the edifice of my life crashing down, of yesterday, my predominant emotions this time were loneliness and fear. I was, for long minutes, the same terrified boy I'd been at 13, sitting on my own at school literally trembling at the potential consequences of my peers discovering the 'real me'. I'm sure there would be many who would say I deserve every bit of unhappiness I get, given my desires, but, for the umpteenth time, I didn't choose to be this way, I'd have had to be insane to make such a choice. If I could wish it away, I'd do it in a heartbeat. Not, of course, that anyone other than another boylover could possibly understand my situation, or even care. In the specious court of public opinion, we've long since been summarily tried and condemned.

Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B