Truly, deeply....

....tired of it all. Yeah, cracked record, heard it all before, but two 'boy moments', or, probably more accurately, non-moments, exacerbated by the usual fuckwitted nonsense at work, really have left me wondering what the point of any of this stupid charade actually is. A truly beautiful boy on my way to work, more than a little reminiscent of the boy who lived next door when we first moved to Cornwall (apart from the fact that today's boy had dark rather than fair hair), and then, tonight, 'little friend', in my local, looking straight through me several times. No reason whatsoever, of course, why I should expect either boy to do anything other than go about their own business, but both encounters underlined the hopelessness of my situation, the fact that my chances of ever finding what I want the most in my life are somewhere between infinitesimal and zero. Why bother?

Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B