Well, I have to say that four page views in the last two days is a pretty conclusive vote of apathy. So, what do I do about it? Try to appease, make myself more 'popular'? Give up completely, and go and skulk in my closet? Or stick two fingers up to the world, and actually be more 'myself'? The latter certainly appeals a lot more than the two former options.
So, in that vein....Cammy. I saw him earlier this evening, albeit briefly, and the way the encounter went encompassed both aspects of the rollercoaster that little guy induces in me. When he came in, he went straight to the person I've been getting all chewed up over recently and started chatting. My teeth were gritted, my fists clenched. The green-eyed monster, once more. But then, two minutes later, he was smiling and waving at me, which I returned in kind, of course. And my spirits were back up again. What would I want from Cammy, in an ideal world? Not sex, and absolutely not penetrative sex, he's far, far too young, and commensurately small, to even think about that. But a friend, and a 'cuddle buddy'? I'd love that so much. Not that I have the slightest expectation of such an eventuality, but the daydream won't go away. Or if not Cammy, one of the other cuties I've seen in my local of late. But they're just as far out of reach as he is. 'Never' used to be the scariest word in the world. Now it's just a fact of life.
Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B
So, in that vein....Cammy. I saw him earlier this evening, albeit briefly, and the way the encounter went encompassed both aspects of the rollercoaster that little guy induces in me. When he came in, he went straight to the person I've been getting all chewed up over recently and started chatting. My teeth were gritted, my fists clenched. The green-eyed monster, once more. But then, two minutes later, he was smiling and waving at me, which I returned in kind, of course. And my spirits were back up again. What would I want from Cammy, in an ideal world? Not sex, and absolutely not penetrative sex, he's far, far too young, and commensurately small, to even think about that. But a friend, and a 'cuddle buddy'? I'd love that so much. Not that I have the slightest expectation of such an eventuality, but the daydream won't go away. Or if not Cammy, one of the other cuties I've seen in my local of late. But they're just as far out of reach as he is. 'Never' used to be the scariest word in the world. Now it's just a fact of life.
Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B
1st.Comment.Don't give up,I look forward to reading your blog
ReplyDeleteon a daily basis.I don't have anything to contribute but I know I would miss you if you were to quit.
Hello
DeleteThanks for your interest in the blog, and your comment. I do have occasional 'why bother?' moments with the blog, but, on the whole, I'm bloody-minded enough to use any perceived apathy or negativity as an encouragement to continue, and to be more forthright rather than less in what I might write. No-one can predict the future, of course, but I'm not expecting to be giving up any time soon.
Love & best wishes
Sammy B
Hello Sammy
ReplyDeleteI can only echo what Ubisofty has said. I admire your courage and honesty in keeping this blog going. Yours may be a lone voice in the wilderness, but a very relevant one, none the less. You have a right to be heard. We all do. Long may you continue.
Warmest Regards - Dave
Hello Dave
DeleteAs I said recently, there don't seem to be many people queueing up to advocate for us, so it'll have to be a 'DIY' job. Maybe I'll live to regret putting my head above the parapet, but if that is how things turn out, sobeit.
Love & best wishes
Sammy B