Our (relatively) new next door neighbour had a barbeque yesterday afternoon, and he invited us to drop in. My daughter was out at her usual Saturday afternoon activity, so we told the neighbour that we couldn't stay too long, because we had to leave at 5:00 to pick my daughter up. As it transpired, it was a good thing that we only had time for a brief visit, because a few minutes after we'd arrived, another group of guests came into his garden, a couple and a boy of around 12 or 13. Not too put too fine a point on it, by the time we left half an hour or so later, I was finding it very difficult to disguise my interest in him - he wasn't quite on a par with the boy who I see regularly from work, but he was the most attractive I've seen anywhere near here for a good while. Given our recent difficulties, I don't think it would've been the best time for my wife to catch me drooling over forbidden fruit, so a strategic retreat came just at the right moment. For all the navel-gazing about what I would or wouldn't do in the face of temptation, the fact remains that I could still get involved, the basic attraction is still there.
Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B
It's hard to ignore beauty when you come upon it. Just because you appreciate it and are attracted to it doesn't mean you would do anything to cause a problem. Just appreciate it for what it is and don't feel guilty about it.
ReplyDeleteHi there, Sammy
ReplyDeleteIt's not wrong to be attracted to someone - you don't have any control over who you're attracted to. I can see why being obviously attracted might be embarrassing and awkward, though.
I understand that sense of socially unacceptable fascination with another person, and typically one that you don't know. There are several young (i.e. twenty-something) men working for other companies on the same site as my employer whom I could happily watch all day. It requires a definite mental effort to turn my head away and keep on walking sometimes...
Take care
Mark
Hello Brian & Mark
ReplyDeleteI think the issue in this case was more the potential embarrassment of the situation, unexpectedly finding myself around someone I wouldn't have gone near voluntarily, rather than any underlying guilt about finding him attractive, especially in the difficult scenario of the previous few days. I guess it's just all part of the experience of being a boylover in a world where that sexual preference is equated in terms of damage to society (and I have seen this in print) with suicide bombers.
Love & best wishes
Sammy B