I've got a suspicion that an elephant in the room which I've somehow managed to elude for months, if not years, is about to make its presence felt. Without wishing to delve into too many gory details, my sex life has dwindled rather dramatically over the last few years, and it's now got to the point, for the first time in quite a while, where my wife has felt compelled to want to talk about it. It's not that I'm unable to get involved, given the right circumstances, although I have to be rather more careful than before my heart problems, but I'm not sure if it's what I want now. Obviously, I don't want to lie to my wife, but if I just come out and tell her the unexpurgated truth, I don't think it's too likely that she'll want to carry on being with me. Given that I still love her as much as ever, that's not an outcome that I want to have to countenance, so I'm at a bit of a loss at the moment as to where to go next. I guess some people would accuse me of wanting to have my cake and eat it, but I'm not doing any eating - I'm dealing with my attraction to boys with self-restraint and just not allowing myself to get anywhere near them, while, hitherto, I've just evaded the other half of the scenario. Truth will out, I suppose, sooner or later, so it will no doubt come down to trying to work out what the least worst option is and putting it into practise with as little hurt to all concerned as possible. I've just got such a bad feeling about how this weekend is going to go.
Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B
Things do sound a bit ominous. Good luck. There may be rough times ahead.
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