Let's don't go there

Much as I'm looking forward to seeing my daughter on Sunday, I'm finding myself daydreaming as much, if not more, about the prospects of chancing upon DBJ. There are a number of reasons, if I'm rational about it, why this is a terrible idea. The most obvious is that it very probably won't happen, but there are others that might well come into play if I did see him - he'll be 15, going on 16 now, and my image of him as my perfect boy could be tarnished by seeing a more 'grown-up' version, and, even more likely, if I did find the opportunity and courage to speak to him, the result would be the kind of disinterested rejection that I dreamed, and blogged about ages ago. There's no reason, of course, why his reaction should be any different - even if he remembered/recognised me, there was never any real connection between us before, just my dreams and fantasies. For all that, though, it's so hard to let go of the tenuous hope that we could connect in some way. That's what unrequited love can do to you, I guess.

Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B