I'm sitting here, at 4:00 in the morning, utterly unable to sleep. Every time I lie down, I start coughing. The whole process of trying to rest seems to be an exercise in futility. Hopefully, at some point, I'll give out in sheer exhaustion, although I seem to have gone past the tired stage, anyway, my body, what little that's left of it that's working properly, at least, maybe thinks that it's now time to get up.
Speaking of futility, one of the byways of cyberspace I've passed down in the last couple of hours referred to the nomenclature that boylovers use to describe themselves, the attempt to find a word or phrase without negative connotations. Pointless, completely pointless. Whatever we call ourselves, the world just sees us as 'paedos', our only acknowledgable goal being self-gratification. A world with no shades of grey whatsoever, you're either 'normal', and on the side of the angels, or you're a predator, a rapist, evil incarnate. The haters have won, as far as I can see. All that remains is for the likes of me to be rounded up and sent to the gas chambers. And the 'normals' will cheer. Until it's their turn to be rounded up for some other infraction of 'normality'. There are times when I have doubts about whether I want to live in a world like this one. Now is most assuredly one of those times.
Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B
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