If there's one 'festival', for want of a better word, which has been more irrelevant than any other, and continues to be irrelevant, right through my life, it's Valentine's Day. Apart from a handful from my ex, and I use the word handful advisedly - I always remembered, all the time we were together, right up to two weeks before that phone call, but she rarely did - I've never received a Valentine's card in my life, and I most certainly don't expect that streak to be broken today. In any case, the only 'class of person' I would want to send me a card would be vanishingly unlikely to do so, even if I was 'secretly admired'. And as K, fresh out of bed, has just said, it's all just a capitalist marketing scam, and heteronormative to boot.
The concept of redundancy, too, has made me think once more about the future of the blog. There's a fairly significant 'blogaversary' coming up in the next couple of weeks, and, given the continuing almost complete apathy my writing seems to engender, and the circularity of the themes here and in Nephelokokkygia, it makes me wonder what the point of it all is. If it helped me in some way, even if no-one at all read it, that could be a justification, but even that small potential benefit is conspicuous by its absence. Maybe once I've got through this week and a day of night shifts, and my recent trough of downbeat mood, things will look brighter, and I'll find some modicum of inspiration. But maybe I won't.
Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B
The concept of redundancy, too, has made me think once more about the future of the blog. There's a fairly significant 'blogaversary' coming up in the next couple of weeks, and, given the continuing almost complete apathy my writing seems to engender, and the circularity of the themes here and in Nephelokokkygia, it makes me wonder what the point of it all is. If it helped me in some way, even if no-one at all read it, that could be a justification, but even that small potential benefit is conspicuous by its absence. Maybe once I've got through this week and a day of night shifts, and my recent trough of downbeat mood, things will look brighter, and I'll find some modicum of inspiration. But maybe I won't.
Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B
It’s refreshing to me to read your posts on both sites because it makes me realize I could possibly be worse off than I am though not by much.
ReplyDeleteHello
DeleteEven if your comment is, as I suspect, ironic, you're more than welcome to bask in the black body radiation of my benighted life.
Love & best wishes
Sammy B
I agree with you on Valentines Day. Other than the early classroom "make one for everyone" kind of thing, I too, have been bereft of anything seemingly joyful on this day. Sigh. I want to post about it, but don't want a pity party of comments, ya know? But I got nothing positive to say about a day devoted to that "special someone".
ReplyDeletePeace <3
Jay
Hello Jay
DeleteValentine's Day certainly seems to be designed to make the emotional 'have-nots' feel even worse about themselves than they might already. And that's without even starting on how gay kids (or adults) might feel about having the stereotypical 'boy/girl romance' shoved down their throats for days, if not weeks, on end. A pile of ordure, from start to finish.
Love & best wishes
Sammy B
HA!!!
ReplyDeleteI am just happy to be alive and still walking upright!!!
:-)
-Andy
-Andy
Hello Andy
DeleteI feel the same way, especially after my ill health a couple of years ago, but that doesn't, in itself, have any direct relevance to the redundancy of either Valentine's Day, or this blog. I know there are people far worse off than I am, and that is something I'm grateful for.
Love & best wishes
Sammy B
I don't think I worded that very well - I'm not grateful that other people are badly off, but that my situation isn't as bad as many others. I think that sounds a bit less misanthropic!
DeleteSB
I only recently discovered your blogs, and have found much of your writings quite inspirational. I agree on the pointlessness of Valentine's day, but I sincerly hope you don't take the redundancy option as far as your blogs are concerned. Your creativity has become a welcome oasis in the desert-like landscape that otherwise stetches out before me.
ReplyDeleteHello
DeleteThank you for your kind comment. One of the things I aspired to when I began blogging was to help other people, if there was any way that I could, but I don't, in my judgment, seem to have been very successful in that regard. As far as carrying on with the blogs, or not, is concerned, I go through phases, every so often, when I wonder whether to go on, but hitherto, and, notwithstanding a hiatus of three or four months after my marriage broke up in 2012, I have always done so, and probably will this time as well.
I don't, obviously, know your personal circumstances, but, knowing mine all too well, I can relate to the 'desert' analogy - there is little more arid than being a boylover in today's society, when the only 'rain' is of opprobrium. I hope very much that you can find a way to navigate a safe and happy path through your particular landscape.
Love & best wishes
Sammy B
Thanks Sammy - I'll do my best.
Delete