I know I said I wasn't going to write about this stuff anymore, but a couple of random things that happened last night that linked together all too well began these musings, to the point I've decided to break my resolution.
When I got on my train home at 'worktown' last night, it proved to be a 'tale of two cuties'. The first, already on the train when I boarded, was obviously too young - 10 or 11 - but he reminded me more than a little of R, the first boy I ever fell in love with when I was still at school, His hair in particular, in terms of both colour and style, was almost identical, and there were facial similarities, too. If the youngster was strictly 'eye candy only', someone who got on the train just before it left was, at least theoretically, rather different. He was undoubtedly of legal age, maybe 18 or 19, and he was very cute. Not that I expected for a moment that he would've been interested in me, even if he was gay, but he certainly caught my eye. Both of them got off the train within three stops, and that would've been that, except for something I read online when I got back to the flat. I must have been at a particularly loose end, because I found myself reading a couple of threads at the forum attached to a story site I visit occasionally. I can only remember having looked at the forum once before, and that was probably four or five years ago, so for me to be there at all was very much out of the ordinary, but the particular thread that I read a good deal of tied in with the story I wrote about in my last post, and with my thoughts about the young man on the train. The site 'owner' had initiated a discussion about what constitutes 'abuse', particularly in connection with 'intergenerational' relationships. He posted a list of rhetorical questions, and it was the very first of them that was particularly apposite - it contained the phrase '...child (however that is defined)'. The replies, for the most part, were predicable enough, yes, it's always wrong, always abuse, but some of the suggestions as to what constituted 'wrong' really brought home just how repressive 'society' is becoming in this subject area. Relationships where both parties are of legal age, but there was more than a five year age difference (more than 2/3 years in one comment) when the younger is 'barely legal' were deemed unacceptable (hence the link with the young man on the train), and one commenter even suggested a relationship between a 15 and a 13 year old would be wrong. And this was on what is basically a 'gay' site, not some tabloid fuelled 'hang the paedos' place. It brought yet another Nineteen Eighty-four quote to mind - 'the weaker the opposition, the tighter the despotism'. It probably should've been predictable, but it was depressing, nonetheless.
Love & best wishes
Sammy B
When I got on my train home at 'worktown' last night, it proved to be a 'tale of two cuties'. The first, already on the train when I boarded, was obviously too young - 10 or 11 - but he reminded me more than a little of R, the first boy I ever fell in love with when I was still at school, His hair in particular, in terms of both colour and style, was almost identical, and there were facial similarities, too. If the youngster was strictly 'eye candy only', someone who got on the train just before it left was, at least theoretically, rather different. He was undoubtedly of legal age, maybe 18 or 19, and he was very cute. Not that I expected for a moment that he would've been interested in me, even if he was gay, but he certainly caught my eye. Both of them got off the train within three stops, and that would've been that, except for something I read online when I got back to the flat. I must have been at a particularly loose end, because I found myself reading a couple of threads at the forum attached to a story site I visit occasionally. I can only remember having looked at the forum once before, and that was probably four or five years ago, so for me to be there at all was very much out of the ordinary, but the particular thread that I read a good deal of tied in with the story I wrote about in my last post, and with my thoughts about the young man on the train. The site 'owner' had initiated a discussion about what constitutes 'abuse', particularly in connection with 'intergenerational' relationships. He posted a list of rhetorical questions, and it was the very first of them that was particularly apposite - it contained the phrase '...child (however that is defined)'. The replies, for the most part, were predicable enough, yes, it's always wrong, always abuse, but some of the suggestions as to what constituted 'wrong' really brought home just how repressive 'society' is becoming in this subject area. Relationships where both parties are of legal age, but there was more than a five year age difference (more than 2/3 years in one comment) when the younger is 'barely legal' were deemed unacceptable (hence the link with the young man on the train), and one commenter even suggested a relationship between a 15 and a 13 year old would be wrong. And this was on what is basically a 'gay' site, not some tabloid fuelled 'hang the paedos' place. It brought yet another Nineteen Eighty-four quote to mind - 'the weaker the opposition, the tighter the despotism'. It probably should've been predictable, but it was depressing, nonetheless.
Love & best wishes
Sammy B
I don't get the whole "still not old enough". If they're legal, they're legal. I think when it becomes lopsided is if the older coerces or otherwise adversely creates a bad atmosphere, which is, of course, directly opposite to consensual, aware entry into a relationship. I've heard all the arguments for "not more than 20 years younger" (when one is my age) and all that, but pffft. I have a near-perfect friendship with a 19yo, I know another guy my age who wakes up with 18yo apprentice naked on the bed beside him, and it's all good, proper and not at all coercive or otherwise lopsided. Screw 'em. Stick to your morals and you'll be OK.
ReplyDeletePeace <3
Jay
Hello Jay
DeleteI probably didn't make it clear enough, but I was referring to consensual relationships, and how their scope for acceptability seems to be becoming narrower, almost by the week - any relationship involving any element of coercion, irrespective of the permutation of age or gender, is always wrong, as far as I'm concerned. I certainly agree that 'legal is legal', and anyone who tries to add extra restrictions is simply pandering to 'political correctness', or, in the case of some gay elements, throwing those who are attracted to younger people under the bus to enhance their own acceptance by 'society'. All, as I said in the post, thoroughly depressing.
Love & best wishes
Sammy B