It's absolutely fine, making an intellectual decision about the 'right' thing to do, but real life doesn't let you off so easily. Despite my saying 'never, never, never' the other day, it doesn't make the wanting go away. And when the 'ghosts' cross my path, day in, day out - there's one sitting a handful of paces away from me, right now - the possibility of succumbing to temptation is always there, more or less in the background, dependent on circumstances. I know all about self-denial, self-control, if I didn't after forty-odd years, I'd be pretty damn oblivious, but all those years don't make it any easier. But, as I've said often enough before, why should I expect anything to be easy?
Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B
Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B
If life were easy...sigh...I got nothing. Sorry. I know the longing, I know the feelings. But you can't let it be the center, the focus, all the time.
ReplyDeletePeace <3
Jay
Hello Jay
DeleteI have to admit to flirting with the borderlands of obsession every now and again, but the blog is, in a way, a sort of 'optical illusion' in this context - I don't, contrary to appearances, spend my whole life introspecting about boys. Since DBJ, though, the subject has had a higher profile - that most special boy of all changed a lot in my life, completely inadvertently on his part, of course. And the wanting is a part of those changes.
Love & best wishes
Sammy B