Sunday 3 March 2013

Supernumerary

There are days when I feel surplus to requirements, and today has been one of them. I'm starting my latest week of night shifts tonight, but I don't start work until 11:30, so I've been hanging around at my accommodation, not doing anything of any great consequence, only venturing out for a brief shopping trip in early afternoon. It could have been different - my daughter has been up in London today, taking advantage of a discounted travel offer she's currently entitled to, visiting a friend. I suggested, not that I should tag along as some sort of 'gooseberry' to impinge on her time with her friend, but just to meet her for a coffee, to spend half an hour or so with her, when she got back to the station to catch her train home, but she didn't even want to do that. I don't even know whether I'll get to see her during the next school holidays at Easter, because she's seemingly got plans to go to Scotland to see other friends, on the same cheap train fare offer. I'm all for her having her own life, and being independent, but, given my domestic situation, it would be nice to be able to see her at least occasionally. It just seems to accentuate my isolation, the pointlessness of a lot of my life these days. Going through the motions, as I've said before.

Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B

2 comments:

  1. I can only imagine, Sammy. I might see even close by friends once a month, if that. I know my siblings and I see each other no more than 3 times a year, the oldest of my brothers for only 4-5 hours per visit, at most. It's got to be tougher for you with a daughter.
    Peace <3
    Jay

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    Replies
    1. Hello Jay
      I was disappointed to have missed the chance to see her, even if only briefly. I suppose all parents go through the pangs of separation, one way or another, but, given that, as I've said before, the fact that K is pretty much the only worthwhile thing left in my life, it's harder than it might otherwise have been.

      Love & best wishes
      Sammy B

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