I've nearly reached the halfway stage of my two weeks away from home, and while it's far from being ideal, I seem to be coping (Monday night's little meltdown notwithstanding), and the family, as far as I can tell from our telephone conversations, are getting along fine without me as well (dispensable....oh, no!!). I definitely think the psychological boost of having a proper base, where I can at least construct a simulacrum of 'home life' has helped, even if it is only a (largish) single bedroom within a building whose facilities I share with others. At least the feeling I was getting of being a nomad, if not a refugee, has diminished somewhat.
Despite my feeling more grounded, it's still an open question as to how long I can tolerate the schizoid lifestyle. To some extent, the decision is out of my hands, insofar as there are financial strictures involved, but it's still not something I really want to do for years on end. To spend two-thirds of my life away from Cornwall to be able to be able to carry on living in Cornwall has the feel of a self-defeating exercise, unless it can be proven to come under the 'short term pain for long term gain' heading.
Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B
Glad things are settling down. I understand about the commuting, my dad did it for months at a time, and hated every second of it.
ReplyDeleteI'm sure the financials and all that will be working themselves out. Stay steady, Sammy! Better times are a'coming!
Peace <3
Jay
Hello Jay
ReplyDeleteAS I've said before, I hope it's all going to be worth it - it would be pretty soul-destroying to have gone through all the upheavals and still end up without a positive outcome. Time will tell, I guess.
Love & best wishes
Sammy B