My wife rang me earlier, the first time she's called me, rather than me initiating the contact, since last Wednesday. She was upset about work, and how her manager is treating her, and needed to talk. And, of course, I'm here for her, if that's what she wants or needs. I listened, tried to sympathise, tried to make constructive suggestions. All things that I've been able to do before.
But then, another direction, with her changing the subject and saying she 'couldn't square things about us'. It wasn't a definitive answer to what I'd said to her on Saturday, but it doesn't sound encouraging. She still wants me to go home on Thursday, as things stand, though, and she wants me to ring her tomorrow. So I don't know.
Towards the end, she said it all. 'It's just a mess'. What could I do but agree?
Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B
Sammy
ReplyDeleteI think life in general is a mess to some degree: sometimes it's reasonably straightforward, sometimes it's frustratingly complicated.
I would take as quite positive the fact that your wife wants you to go home as planned - maybe she can't (yet?) square things about you, but she does want you to be there, with the opportunity to discuss things in person. It wouldn't surprise me if she objects to your being gay, but is willing to ignore it in the interests of maintaining stability in her life - a sort of Orwell-style "double-think".
Best of luck
Mark
Hello Mark
DeleteComplicated. A bit of an understatement, I think. I am trying to look at the positive side, and, despite her being upset, which I wouldn't have wanted, the fact that she still chose to share her troubles with me might be, in a back-handed sort of way, encouraging. Face-to-face on Thursday will tell more, I suspect.
Love & best wishes
Sammy B
If my life wasn't a mess, I wouldn't know what to do. Spinning in circles seems to be normal for me. At least as far as my social life goes.
ReplyDeleteI think the fact your wife wants you home is a good sign. Unless she's holding a frying pan when you walk in the door! But it is encouraging that she wants to talk face to face, and has asked you to call in the meantime. I think that is positive as it can be. I have to wonder if she thinks this revelation explains so much of the tension and issues between you two, and therefore might be able to reconcile it all with you. Fingers crossed, assuming that is what is best for all three of you!
Wishing you the best!
Peace <3
Jay
Hello Jay
DeleteAs I said to Mark, I'm trying to look on the bright side, and to be encouraged by what's been said so far. Tomorrow is the big day, though.
Love & best wishes
Sammy B