Much of my day has been taken up by doing something I want to do, while evading something I need to do. The 'want' has been finishing and publishing a story on 'Cuckoos' that I've been working on since before Christmas - I started it on December 19, added bits to it, deleted bits from it, went back and revised other bits, and finally seriously set about trying to finish it two days ago, achieving that aim today. It won't be to everyone's taste, I'm sure - in fact, it may not be to anyone's taste, apart from mine - but it is the product of a goodly amount of work, so that may be to its credit, if nothing else is.
The 'need' was a number of phone calls I should've made, and told my wife I would make, in connection with our ailing finances. Sadly, I got thoroughly stressed out about the prospect, to the extent that the pressure broke through my medication, the first time that's happened since the weekend of my falling out with the feral teens of Cornwall last April, leaving me with my heart banging away nineteen to the dozen, and feeling incapable of dealing with anything at all, never mind anything of pressing import. Situations like this leave me feeling totally useless and inadequate, and ashamed of myself, but there are limits to what I can cope with, limits I'm close to reaching just now.
Love & best wishes to all
Sammy B
Hey Sammy;
ReplyDeleteI work in a factory - where I adjust the machinery so to make good parts and supervise the operators. The "fun" thing is that sometimes I have so many things going wrong at the same moment that I'm quickly stressed out. I learned that all I can do is one at a time...and though I may do a bit here, a bit there, I can only do one at a time. I've even had to shut machines down rather than work on them right then as there was too much to do and couldn't manage just one thing. As long as I keep that in my mind, it's ok. I do ok. But, when I try to juggle too many things at the same time....boom. So, maybe that will help you? Just do one thing. Done...move to the next thing. Even if you don't "complete", get to a good stopping point and then move to the next.
I'm cheering for you!
hugs, randy.
oh, also, I started on your story. I like backgammon too...don't play except on the comp. I wasn't able to get too far as I've got to go to work...but looking forward to the rest :)
ReplyDelete-randy.
If I had a nickle for the number of times I got the "wants" done instead of the "needs", I'd be a rich man.
ReplyDeletePeace <3
Jay
Hello Randy and Jay
ReplyDeleteThings are still rather unsettled this morning, both in terms of my health and the more general situation. Problems don't generally fix themselves, of course, so I'm going to have to bite the bullet and deal with the issues at some stage. I hope I've got the wherewithal to do it soon.
Love & best wishes
Sammy B